Feeling sad it didn't happen as it was meant to, but also feeling grateful for lots of things. Like, that just before all this happened I had the best trip to Malta for the marathon there, plus we can still do running outside in the sunshine so long as we are careful to stay away from people, and (perhaps most importantly) I have loads of toilet rolls.
Life is a little weird, but feeling a bit more used to it now. Work days are a 5 km run to work, do work (I work in a community NHS service, which has been drastically cut back and most of my colleagues are so amazing and have moved to the hospital to help - I'm carrying on for now with my current role, with the tube feeding patients - so I feel bad about not being at the hospital helping, but then there hasn't been much change in the volume of work to do, and there are many more discharges than normal, which need a lot of work to get people set up and settled on their tube feeds at home, so I guess I'm still being useful). Then after that, a 5 km run home. For the first time ever I managed to run to work and back every day this week. I found a new route which is much quieter, and I feel quite safe doing that, and it's much better than getting public transport would be. So that's 10 km every day. And then some weights/ yoga/ core work after getting home.
Yesterday, the start of the weekend, I was getting anxious looking out at the canal and seeing lots of people on the towpath. Last weekend getting up at 04.00 to run when it was quiet didn't really work out for me, so I was wondering how to run and stay safe, but not get totally knackered doing it. Thought about running to the City, which usually is busy, but I wondered....if many people are working at home, maybe it would be quieter....
So gave it a go, and it was so quiet, it was ace! Did 7 miles yesterday and 9 miles today and it was quite spooky, but also magical, running through the city, and past places like St Paul's, London Wall, The Royal Courts of Justice, with hardly any people and virtually no cars.
So, it might not be the Paris Marathon, but it's not a bad substitute, really.
I suppose it's not always such a bad thing to have a bit of time to think about things that you've done and be thankful for them, rather than always doing more and more things so quickly that you don't always have time to really appreciate them. My Granny, when she was poorly and moved into a care home, used to say, that she'd done all the things that she'd wanted to in life, and was lucky to have done that, and now she was happy sitting and thinking back through all the memories. I always loved that she said that! Of course, I don't want to stop doing things, but whilst we are a bit of enforced "reflection time" it's a good habit that I'm trying to get into. For example, rather than adding to my marathon spreadsheet just now, I'm going through it and remembering about each race and finding the medal/certificate/badge etc. I'm remembering loads of stuff I'd forgotten!
Take care, and stay safe! 💙💚💛💜
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