Despicable Run - Marathon #104, 23.03.19

The Despicable Run was aptly named, as that was how I felt for most of it. After being all zen and mindful last week, and making progress with working on scrapping my habit of tending to believe that good things happening must be followed by bad things, I am ashamed to say that I have taken a giant steps backwards this week. 

It started with missing the bus. Then all the trains to Egham were cancelled. I managed to hop on the one remaining train that was delayed rather than cancelled and was going to Staines, which was further away from the race than Egham was, but still within walking distance of the start, so on the plus side got in an extra 2.5 miles jog in before the run. Actually made it to the start with a bit of spare time, so first panic over. And lots of people there I knew, and you know, everything always feels better once you're at the start of the race, early in the morning, and a whole day of running and friends is before you.

I'd decided today to try to do 50 km, as I didn't think I could do another faster marathon like the last few weeks, and I have a 50 miler in a couple of weeks and haven't run further than a marathon in a few weeks so was a bit worried. I was just all over the place though today, and couldn't stay focused on what I was doing, plus I don't have a watch so didn't know how fast I was running. So ended up doing the first half in 2 hours which wasn't the plan, and I suppose went some way to explaining why I was finding it hard. Thank you everyone for the smiles on the way round, and Craig for putting up with me again and helping me through - tough times are always made better by friends. I'm sure no one realises just how much a smile/ hug/ high five/ good chat lifts me! I didn't feel too much like carrying on to do the 50 km, but I made myself do it, and I was glad that I did what I said I would do.

I seemed to be in company in having a tough day today though. People were falling over all over the place, birds were pooing on people, everything seemed to be falling apart. Hope everyone's alright after all the incidents, and no lasting damage has ensued. 

As well, this is also a dreadful blog, as I also can't focus on writing anything decent, for which I apologize. I found something exciting though, about an actual proper writer. There's a cafe in Egham called Egham on Toast, which always makes me think of Green Eggs and Ham by Dr Seuss, but always assumed it was just a coincidence. But! In WW2 US author Theodore Seuss Geisel (Dr Suess!) was stationed in Egham, working on a propaganda film, but was unhappy in his temporary abode.  Fight Sergeant Sam Beckinsale, Dr Seuss's host, tried to help by pointing to the benefits of the local area, such as how nice and green it was, yet Dr Seuss was nonplussed, stating "I do not like green Egham". Apparently, it was the inspiration for his later book Green Eggs and Ham, and the line in it - "I do not like them Sam, I am. I do not like green eggs and ham."

Although it was tough, and I've been moaning a bit, today was actually really good, and Saturn always put on brilliant events, and today was no exception. Thanks to George and Charlotte of Saturn Running, and to the brilliant volunteers, and the aid station that I'm sure gets bigger every time! Well done everyone today!

And on the plus side, I suppose after a run of bad stuff, then that means good stuff is going to happen again, right. Demonstrated by my medal (and either Kevin, Bob, or Stuart minion)...one moment you may be here....

and the next, here!

I love my medal, and I guess the medals that feel like harder work, you feel a bit more attached to. And, as the minions say.... BANANA!!! 

Marathon #103 - The Doh'Nut Run, 16.03.2019

Back to the Thames for a windy run near Reading, the Doh’Nut Run, with Saturn Running. Feeling a bit forlorn, the trees outside our house got cut down, and whilst I was having breakfast (#1) I was watching the magpies that used to sit in the tree and look in the window, walking around in circles where their tree used to be. In one moment, their world had totally changed. I think I was tired, and a bit emotional, and maybe a bit hormonal, but it all seemed very sad.

Still, I suppose there were two, and that means ‘joy’ I think, in the poem “one for sorrow, two for joy…..”

As there were no longer any trees to look at, I was unable to check the wind forecast from the looking out of the window, but as soon as I went outside, it was clear that Storm Gareth was still hanging on. Made it to Paddington for breakfast (#2), and got the train to Reading where met up with Kasia and Craig to walk along the river to the start. Lots of time to catch up with friends in the warmth of the rowing club, and have a quick breakfast #3.

But, the start could not be put off, and we must brave the wind. Blimey. Doughnuts, cups, sweets were flying off the aid station in all directions. I caught a cinnamon bun mid air, for breakfast #4.

Ran with Craig, and the first half also with Paul who was fresh from the SVN 100 only a week ago. Likewise Sarah, Jon, Kat and other brave souls had also conquered the 100 mile beast last weekend. I am so in awe, and inspired by you all. For doing it, obviously, and also for running so brilliantly so soon after. I didn’t run properly for about 3 months after the last 100 I did, I am so crap, but you have all forced me think that it is possible, to conquer it, and come out of it strong. Well done all!

It was quite tough running today. I felt a bit tired, I ran the last two marathons faster than I have been used to, and I think I felt it today as it seemed a bit harder. The wind was also a beast – well, it was a lapped run, so ½ of each lap was nice, as the wind was behind us, but about a ¼ of the lap didn’t have much shelter so on the way back it felt like someone was pushing you backwards running into that wind. Still, good training I guess. Despite the wind, today was a lot of fun, and did we 3.56.

The wind was the name of the game, as on the way home I almost got hit by a For Sale sign that got blown off a building and landed right in front of me. I was still a bit emotional, I think, and now even more tired as I had just run a marathon, but my mind can get quite carried away in these moments - thinking of all the maybe not so good things that happened in the week, and this is just another one…. I might have a had a good day at the marathon, but this was a sign (literally) that the universe was giving me that I shouldn’t get used to good things. But, as I am realising, this is a very unhelpful thought pattern. I have started doing mindfulness exercises - not very many, but I have got an app, and manage sometimes actually to do a meditation exercise for 3 whole minutes in the morning before work, instead of freaking out about all the things I have to do and all the things that I’ve probably done wrong yesterday etc etc etc, it feels a bit odd to focus just on this moment, and that nothing is going wrong right now…..

I’m finding it quite useful for running too, and I think is partly why I’ve been feeling more relaxed since I did 100. I’ve always, despite having lots of practice at running, had a tenancy to be a bit stuck on things, if I’m having a bad patch in a run, my mind (if not my feet) races off and before I know it I’ve convinced myself the rest of the run will be the same. I know this not to be true – runs are like waves, they go up and down - but it’s amazing really, how ingrained your thought processes become. It’s really hard to change, but I’m finding it quite liberating to try, and give yourself permission to ignore those thoughts. So, I will keep on trying, not fixating on what just happened (like, maybe I tripped on a rock), or what might happen (so, I will probably trip on another one) and think instead that right now I'm not tripping over anything, and actually, right now it's OK.

Thanks everyone for a great run today, and well done all! Big well done to Kasia who nailed #88 💜 Thank you George and Charlotte at Saturn Running and all the volunteers for a top class event!

Running (The Thames Meander, Marathon #102) and watching running

Done this marathon 7 times before, and have been consistent in the sense that I've completely messed it up all 7 times; falling over on two of them and getting an injury, and making myself sick the other 5 times, so I'd decided it would be a good idea to enter it again.....

Luckily this time around was much better, thanks to who I was running with, who are much better at these things than me - thanks Craig, Ray and Anthony for the company. It was a fun run today, and I really enjoyed it. The end was a bit tough, you have to go past the finish, and then do another about 1.5 mile loop, which hurt a bit, but then it's a marathon so I suppose it should do. It was really windy, and the Thames is really wiggly, so one moment it seemed the wind was behind, then in front, then the side, and then all the directions all over again. I've always found this run a bit competitive and haven't really known that many people there, so it was nice today to see lots of people I knew there, and it felt more relaxed. Thanks Craig for running with me today, and for helping me round in 3:54 - I don't think times matter so much because we're all different, and even ourselves are different on different days - but I feel a bit more confident to know that I can still do times like I did before, and to be able to enjoy a run at that pace. 

Got to say a massive well done to all my friends who ran the SVN Samphire 100 this weekend. Absolutely brilliant, the lot of you!!! The weather was tough this weekend, and 100 miles is not easy, especially not in that. Very proud of everyone, and feeling inspired by you all.

Today I went to support my friend Sarah run the Vitality Big Half, a half marathon around London. Was brilliant fun, cheering people on. I get quite emotional seeing things like this, so many people pushing themselves to achieve things. Managed to see Sarah twice, at about 8 and 11 miles, on the bit of the route south of the river near Rotherhithe/ Surrey Quays. Sarah was pretty close in the field to Kerry, so saw Kerry twice too which was a bonus - two days in a weekend, and twice in a day (I will stop stalking you now!) Well done both, am so proud of you!

Just before I saw Sarah at 11 miles, I was standing by a marshal, and a runner who was looking absolutely amazing, suddenly ran over to the marshal and burst into tears. I think she was overwhelmed by it all, she was really sobbing. I was heartbroken! The marshal, the lady next to me, and me, all did hugs and words, and in a minute or so, she set off again - on the last 2 miles, I knew she could do it, and I hope she did, and that she was proud of herself for doing so. It just goes to show, you can never tell what someone is thinking from looking at them. And it also shows, as I have experienced many a time, that you shouldn't worry about showing your emotions, because when people know what you're feeling, they can help you with it. I hope she remembers what we said to her, that she was amazing, because she is, and she did so well.

As did everyone this weekend on their different challenges - both official events, and un-official ones, there was a lot going on - well done all 😊 xxx

Marathon #101 - The Spring Marathon, 02.03.19

Well after my #100 I was feeling really down, and also last week was quite rubbish for a few reasons, which I suppose didn't help with that. So I thought, the best way to get over something is meant to be getting on top of something else.  That might be how to get over people, come to think of it, but that's a bit rude for on here, but then I've run heard too many Phoenix aid station jokes lately and seen too many giant willys run around tracks, so my mind is contaminated. Anyway, if the best way to get over something is to get on top of something else, then it was time for another run....

So, it was back to Walton-on-Thames for another Phoenix Run, the Spring Marathon. I woke up at 5, and felt pretty knackered, but also excited to be going back to Phoenix. Got the front upstairs seat on the bus again, which is the best thing, and there weren't even that many drunk people around London this morning at that time, so it was all very relaxing on the way to Waterloo. I was even early, and had time to get a new railcard, and have a second breakfast. Once at Walton, I was planning to walk to the start of the run from the station, which is 2.3 miles, but just as I was setting off, Tim magically ran up behind me, and offered me a lift - thank you!! So Tim, Ben, Katherine and I arrived at the start in plenty of time, so we relaxed for a while with Kerrilee, and there was time for a third breakfast, whilst all the other runners started to arrive. Lots of chats and smiles - everyone is so good at cheering each other up, I really appreciate it 😊 Always good to catch up and hugs with Kasia and Gemma, and am excited for Gemma running her first ever double this weekend, and Kasia's second in two weekends! 

Got to wear my new vest - it felt a bit weird putting it on the is morning, but I love it. Everyone was so nice about it today (even the accidentally giant letters for my name), and had lots of encouragement for marathon #101. It may very well be the most expensive vest in the world, but it's 100% worth it. 

I loved the run today. The weather was great again, and it felt good to be gilding through the fresh air, surrounded by blue sky and blossom, and lovely runners. Lots and lots of familiar faces out there today, and met lots of new ones too, and it was lovely to see everyone. I loved the route as well, it was the big loop up to Hampton Court and back x 4 for the marathon. I usually prefer the other way along the towpath, but after having had a pep talk from Ben at the start, as to why this way was better, I decided to go at it with an open mind, and I think he was right, as it was a perfect route today. Great aid stations as well, and Jen and Davo at the Hampton Court end dishing out smiles and motivation 😁 Also, a lovely bunch of people sat outside the pub by the start/finish turnaround point who were brilliant. 

I ran a bit faster than normal for me today. I was thinking about why. I was running away from the last week I suppose, and I thought if I ran faster, it would go away quicker. And, I'm not running tomorrow, so I didn't care if my legs hurt. And, I also think maybe I was just feeling a bit more relaxed about stuff now I've done 100, like if I ran too fast and couldn't finish, then no one would really mind, and probably most of all, I didn't mind, so much. And, I really needed a wee from about 3 miles in. I think needing a wee was the main one. 

I felt really good for the first two laps, then had a bit of a blip for the first 1/2 of lap three, but a (big) handful of jelly beans seemed to help, and then I felt fine again for the rest of it. I did 3:50, and I haven't run under 4 hours in almost 3 years, and didn't think I still could, so I was quite surprised by myself.

Great to stick around at the end, the aid station there was like a party with some cracking tunes, and see plenty of runners cross the line....brilliant running from everyone today, all great achievements, and well done all. 7 people ran their first marathon today, and I got chatting to one of them at the end - it's so exciting, #1 - what an exciting time and brilliant achievement. 

Thank you Rik and marshalls, and runners, and supporters - I am feeling much better after today 😊😊😊

Thought I should continue with getting on top of people things, so have booked in some more runs:

09.03.19 - Thames Meander Marathon

16.03.19 - Doh Nut Run

23.03.19 - Despicable Me Run

06.04.19 - The Woldsman Returns 50 miles

13.04.19 - 22.04.19 - 10 in 10

....need some more in May...

Then 25.05.19 The Hadrian Hundred (😲)